Karen Zerby
GN 1187 FD/MM/FM
By Maria 3611 6/06
Dearest Family,
1. Throughout life we are faced with difficult choices, some of which mean a forsaking of something important to us. We go through breakings and we suffer loss. The Lord gives, and He takes away. We know He does it in love, but it's still often a big breaking to yield to what He has done or is doing, to trust Him, to make the decision to believe that He knows best, and to flow with His plan‚ no matter how painful it seems at the moment.
2. There are times when, after something really big has happened in our lives, we've gone through a very difficult time, or had to forsake something very dear to us‚ we reach a point through yieldedness and submission to the Lord's will in our lives where we realize that Jesus is truly enough.—Where our lives are relatively uncomplicated because we're not so worried about things, or so intensely hoping for them to turn out a certain way; the place where we count everything else "but loss" (Phil.3:8), worthless in comparison to our relationship with Jesus and our desire to solely fulfill His will for our lives.
3. Sometimes, however, that hard-earned perspective is fairly short-lived. And it's often so costly reaching that point. It would be nice if we could carry that perspective through our lives much more consistently.
4. We're naturally pretty attached to the things of this world. We are earthbound, and our human tendency is to put quite a few limitations on what we want to do, or are willing to do, or even feel we can do. We set boundaries, saying, "I'll do this, but not that; I'll give up this‚ but not that."
5. But as we progress as disciples, we need to be more detached from the world. And if you look to the great men and women of faith in the past, they were, almost without exception, very strong in this point. We need to enter that realm or get to the point in life where we are so in love with Jesus that other things don't matter so much, where we have more trust in Him to do what is good in our lives, knowing that He's in control and is going to bring good out of it.
6. How do we reach that level of passion? How do we come to that point where Jesus truly is enough? When life is easy and you're not having any big battles, this concept can seem so far off or foreign, and even undesirable. But when you've just been through something really heavy that has touched you deep down at the core of your faith, and you've made decisions there in the valley of testing that Jesus is enough for you, then you can relate to this concept, and you don't ever want to lose that feeling. You know it was hell getting there, but once you have it, you have such peace and confidence in our Lover, and you find such comfort in the Word. Your spiritual life blossoms.
7. We asked the Lord how we can have that peace and dedication more consistently, that devotion and single-mindedness we need so that we can truly say, without regret or reservation, "Jesus is enough." Following is the counsel He gave in answer to that question.
8. I believe it will be inspiring and motivating and comforting for you, and I pray that it will draw you closer into the arms of our dear Lover Who always gives the best to those who leave the choices up to Him—the One Who has promised that whatever we give up for Him here and now, we'll receive one hundredfold later (Mark 10:28–30); the One Who we can never outgive no matter how hard we try!
9. Yet so often we forget those promises and instead cling so tightly to something here and now, so afraid of losing something that we value, and thinking that our way will make us happier than His way. Lord help us to remember these unfailing spiritual principles more often! By rereading the following messages when something comes up that tests us or makes us feel that Jesus is not enough, we can remind ourselves and regain our perspective.
10. (Jesus: ) My loves, that is such a sweet question to ask. I love it when you come before Me humbly, asking nothing else but how you can love Me more, how you can draw closer to Me and allow Me to be more important to you. I cannot help but bless such love and devotion. Any who truly ask this question and hunger and thirst after this righteousness will be filled. Any who read these words with open hearts and minds, desiring to be filled with My answers and to be rewarded with this increased closeness to Me, it will be given them. I love you for your love for Me and I am very thankful to you for asking Me to speak on this subject.
11. I am nigh to them that are of a broken heart‚ and I give grace to the humble. What this means is that there is a special closeness that is given to those who are humble and desperate for Me. And this humility and desperation is born most often in those who have hit bottom and are clinging to nothing else in life but their love for Me and their desire to live in the spirit and partake of Me more fully. This is a special gift given to them, the honey that only comes forth after the squeezing.
12. What usually happens after these hard choices and deep sorrows is a sense of pure joy and happiness of the soul. You know that you have made Me very happy by doing the right thing‚ and you want to continue bringing that joy into your life by serving Me in whatever way I want to be served. You think so little of yourself and almost exclusively about Me and what My will for your life is.
13. I can use you greatly in this state. I can pour My love through you to the world and upon your brethren. This is the state I see that you desire to reach and to permanently maintain—useful to Me, but specially in love with Me, specially broken and yielded, specially desirous of My plan for your life, without reservations and without the barriers of self and your own plans.
14. My loves, there is no testimony without a test, no crown without a cross‚ no victory without a battle, and it is precisely through the difficulties and breakings and hard times that I bring into your life that you are able to achieve this special union with Me. This is the fruit I desire to bring about through the purgings that I bring into each one of your lives. If you find that you are often not in this state of "Jesus is enough," then the answer is that you haven't yielded to the purgings and the breakings that I am trying to bring into your life so that you can bear this special fruit.
15. That is the answer, plain and simple. Only through sacrifice, yielding, breaking, forsaking‚ and giving up your own will and plans can My plan of perfect joy, perfect dependence on Me, perfect love for Me, and perfect desire to do My will be perfected. This is the beauty for ashes (Isa.61:3), and without something going through the fire, there is no other way.
16. The love and the relationship we share most of the time is very beautiful, and I love the effort that all of you give in striving for the highest calling of discipleship. I am not displeased with this. I'm not saying that you are not achieving an important level. In fact, I am bringing you along slowly but surely to the place where I am all that matters, where I am the cornerstone of your life, and if you lost the world but kept Me, you'd still be happy—in fact, even more so because you'd be less encumbered with the other cares of life and freer to devote yourself solely to Me.
17. The reason that battles and breakings bring this out so much more clearly is that they accelerate you along this path. They cut abruptly through the fog of your everyday life and bring you into direct contact with My essence, and you have no other recourse but to cling tightly to Me. In the howling wind, the vine is forced onto the trunk of the tree for safekeeping and protection, while in the sunny calm it has to make a conscious choice to grow close to the trunk.
18. This might make you wonder if major trials and breakings are then the only way to be close to Me and to be fully yielded. The good news is, not entirely. The breakings themselves aren't what you're after. What you're after is a feeling of knowing that there is nothing standing between you and Me, nothing you haven't given up for Me or wouldn't give up for Me.
19. When you go through a deep, dark time, it's usually because your worst fears have been realized and you've been asked to do the thing you'd least like to do, or you've been asked to give up the thing you're most afraid of losing. After that there's little left to fear, and that's why you feel so united with Me‚ so in love with Me. When you've rooted out everything that stood between us‚ there is so much more room for Me to fill your life with My love and beauty.
20. So if you want to prolong this feeling and have it every day, you have to take the opportunities that I give you to cleanse your life of your fears, your reservations, and your own will. You have to submit to My pruning and take what I am bringing into your life without hesitation or reservation.
21. But you are like the vine in the calm. The weather is sunny and the air is warm and there is little to push you firmly onto My trunk. You know that through wrapping yourself around Me you will be stronger, but there is also no present danger or imminent reason to grasp onto Me for life itself.
22. I send breezes your way, I nudge you toward the tree, and I send little showers and little winds to help you come closer to Me. If your desire is truly to be wrapped around Me fully, having no other motivation or desire in your life except "I'd rather have Jesus than ANYTHING," then you would be a wise vine to take each breeze and let it push you onto the trunk.
23. The challenges in My Word and the true standard of discipleship present you with infinite choices over the course of your life that could allow you to let go of the things of Earth and self and reach for the things of the spirit. But so often you only do this partially, not quite past the point of comfort, and leave off there.
24. Even without a major breaking in your life, if you truly took the humble road‚ the yielded road, the submissive road, the loving road‚ and each day made the right choices in your life‚ based only on what life threw your way, you could have this special closeness to Me. You'd know that even though your life isn't filled with misery, nothing in it is as important to you as Me, and you'd be one of those special ones to whom I could tell anything and know without a shadow of a doubt that you'd do it just to please Me‚ just to stay close to Me.
25. All of you try to do this to an extent, sometimes more, sometimes less. You try to live as I would want you to live and forsake the things that come between us. I give you nudges about the things that stand between us, or about the props that you are carrying around with you, encouraging you to drop them. I show you the rooms of your life that aren't fully open to Me and I encourage you to give Me access. But often you don't take the initiative to fully fling open the doors and drop the crutches and props and embrace Me and My Spirit.
26. Thus it is usually only when these things are completely taken away from you against your will, with or without your consent, that you truly let go and abandon yourself fully to Me. This is why I sometimes let those windstorms strike, so that you will have no other choice but to wrap yourself around Me for dear life.
27. My loves, I am a faithful Gardener, and I know what you each need to bear fruit. That's why I coax and water, trim and prune‚ and then sometimes I have to roughly chop and cut and expose you to the winds and the rain. If your desire is to bear the fruit that I would have you bear, that of love and yieldedness and the fruits of the Spirit, then I will, in My time, bring it forth in your life.
28. If you can bear this kind of fruit through the gentle breezes and the soft waterings, then so much the better. Yet I know that most of My plants will at some point in their lives need to feel My breakings removing their supports and their coverings, exposing them fully to the fury of the elements. I know that, although it is not joyous for the present, eventually the peaceable fruit of clinging tightly to the tree will minister to them so much happiness and usefulness that they will never want to leave.
29. Yet even after those times, even a chastened and pruned vine will eventually begin to grow away from Me if the utmost care is not taken. Thus I begin the cycle again, the gentle breeze, the soft rain, and eventually another time of hard pruning and a time of storms. This is the cycle through which I wind your life around Mine, always bringing My faithful brides back to their First Love.
30. I say this not to discourage you and cause you to think that you can never win and that you'll always stray and pick up earthly attachments that will displease Me, but rather to illustrate to you your desperate need for Me in your life—even to help you stay as close to Me as you want to. You can desire closeness to Me and yieldedness to Me, and ultimate dedication to Me, but in your own self you will eventually fall short. You are dependent on Me even for your own love toward Me. Only I can truly make you love Me as much as you need to. Do you understand? This is the core of John 15, My "vine and branches" lesson: "Without Me, ye can do nothing" (John 15:5).
31. This isn't to say that you shouldn't try for yieldedness and freedom from the props of worldliness and your own will—you should, and I require no less. I have said that you must take up your cross daily and follow Me (Luk.9:23), and through faithfully doing this each day, through desiring Me and putting Me first, and letting the full application of My Word humble your pride and bring your will into alignment with Mine, you will be drawn very close to Me, and you will know that I am the heart of your life and that I am enough for you.
32. But even your best efforts will fail and fall, and something will be overlooked or not seen. And this is where I will help you, give you another chance to be purged, to be chastened‚ to bring forth more sweet honey through another time of squeezing.
33. This is why you shouldn't look for a time when the pain of battles and breakings will end, but rather you should embrace them.—From the deepest‚ darkest lows of your life when everything is stripped away from you‚ to the smaller breakings of continually saying yes to Me, to even the small ouch your pride receives when you go out of your way to raise your hands in praise to Me or give someone a hug or a word of appreciation.
34. To reach that point of purity of love for Me, you must willingly surrender those things that I would have required of you later. But this is so hard for My children to do; there is so much fear and doubt and reservation. But it is the only path to truly being free to serve Me without hesitation, without thought of self, and it is where true power in My Spirit lies.
35. You must taste and see that I am good. You must surrender that which is dearest to you again and again, turning not to other crutches and desires, but only to Me, and let Me prove to you that with each thing you give up, I am enough to see you through. As you do this again and again—some through your own offerings, some through what I require of you—slowly you will come to that place of having so little of yourself and so much of Me instead.
36. Each time you set something of your self alight‚ it turns to ashes, and another lily of My Spirit grows. Your goal is to burn away as much as you can of yourself and your own desires so that your heart is filled with very few weeds, and instead My lilies of dedication, yieldedness, and perfect love have sprouted everywhere in their place.
37. (Dad: ) Basically, it's the life of faith that helps us to reach that place where Jesus is enough. It's the trials and battles; the things we lose and sacrifice; the things we forsake—and learn that we don't need; the times when we see Him supply for us, satisfy us, and make us happy despite our not having the things we may think we need. It's the forsakings‚ the hardships, the fulfillment, the abounding and abasing, all our experiences lumped together that take us step by step—and in reality almost forces us—to the place where we truly feel and know that Jesus is enough; He's everything to us, and compared to Him, nothing else matters.
38. The way it works is that‚ on the one hand, breakings, battles and forsakings drive us to Him in desperation and in need. On the other hand, they remove the props and the crutches that keep us from being more spiritual and leaning more on Him‚ from really discovering that He can be the beginning and the end of our satisfaction.
39. (Jesus:) When am I enough to you? It's not necessarily a place that you reach after a certain set of circumstances, or a certain amount of experiences—it's a place you have to reach in your heart and mind after certain personal decisions you have made for Me.
40. In other words, it's a conscious decision that you make for Me when you hit upon the realization that, "Wow, my life is really not my own. I really don't care for any of my personal plans and programs; Jesus is the only thing that has remained stable this far, He's all that's mattered so far, so why am I still holding back from Him?" That's when it dawns on you that I am truly enough—meaning you could lose the whole world, but because you have Me, you have everything.
41. When David Livingstone began his missionary expeditions across Africa, things were still a sacrifice for him. At the beginning of his service to Me, he couldn't truthfully say, "I have never made a sacrifice," because he hadn't proved Me yet. He hadn't tested My promises yet. He hadn't yet tasted of My rewards in return for his sacrifices. He hadn't yet experienced that I was enough for him.
42. And so there were sacrifices. First the sacrifices were relatively small, like the harsh climates he had to endure, the uncomfortable traveling conditions, the dangerous tribes he encountered, the pests and plagues of Africa like the mosquitoes, bugs, filthy water, and much more. Sometimes he wondered why he was even embarking on such a mission when the fruit seemed so pathetic; in fact, for the first few years the fruit was hardly even budding.
43. Then the sacrifices became greater, like having to leave his wife and children while he went on missions to other tribes; watching his children suffer the sicknesses of Africa; allowing Me to take one of his children Home to Heaven; sending his whole family back to England while he labored alone in Africa; trusting Me, although his life was touched with affliction time and time again.
44. These were greater sacrifices, but because he had sacrificed in the little things, he had come to see that I was enough reason and purpose to endure the bigger sacrifices too. He had experienced My rewards in return, and this gave him faith and that level of passion to be able to sacrifice yet more for Me.
45. As he continued to serve and sacrifice, he continued to experience My great capacity to satisfy. Each year he found that I was more to him than the year before. And through proving Me, through testing My promises, through sacrificing all to Me, he was able to discover if I alone was enough for him. And by the words of his testimony, "I have never made a sacrifice‚" you can see that he found that I was enough.
46. In much the same way, you too can reach that level of passion where I alone am enough to you. It is through the paths of sacrifice, obedience, service and lowliness that you discover My great capacity to be the world for you.
47. Sacrifice starts first and foremost in your heart, in your mind. It's not so much about what you're giving up or the physical circumstances you find yourself in—it's all about your heart and your attitude toward Me. It's all about your desire to please Me, your willingness to give to Me, your faith to entrust what is precious to you into My hands, your love to give all things to Me.
48. The more you give Me, the more you lay at My feet, the more of yourself you surrender to Me each day‚ the more decisions you make for Me, the more you obey Me and choose My way over your own desires‚ the more you give your love to Me, the more you seek to live My Word‚ the more you prove Me by your faith to stand on My promises, the closer you come to that place of overwhelming passion.
49. It's not that the minute you reach this place, you will instantly be filled with an incredible zeal and passion to dump all worldly things and only live wildly and freely for Me. If you're waiting for that kind of change, then you'll be disappointed. No, this is a change that takes place inside you little by little each day. Each time you give to Me, make a sacrifice for Me, or surrender another bit of your heart and life for Me, you come a step closer to that level of passion.
50. That level of passion is a lot like a bright light shining ahead of you, and each step you take toward that light brings you closer to it‚ letting it shine a little more on you. With each step you're becoming a bit more immersed in that light, and it becomes more important to you, until finally you'll feel it all around you, so bright and intense that not even a shadow can exist in its presence.
51. This is how you too can find that passion, that love that compels you without inhibition for Me. The more you give to Me, the more impassioned you become for Me. The more you live for Me, the more you will see Me work for you. The more you test Me, the more you will find My power is proved. The more you sacrifice for Me‚ the more you will gain from Me. The closer you draw to Me, the closer I will draw to you.—Until you reach the point in your life where you realize that I have fulfilled all your dreams, I have made good on all My promises, I have kept My every word, I have been faithful at every step, and I have proved that I am more than enough for you.
52. There you will find the passion and the love and the overwhelming desire to give and live completely, fully, and without restraint, for Me. That's when your service knows no limits, and you throw yourself wholly into My Spirit and count all else a loss, because you have found everything in Me.
53. And just as this passion can be gained and reached, it can also be lost. As it is acquired through walking the paths of service and sacrifice, it can also be rejected and abandoned through refusing to journey these trails and instead taking the paths of selfishness, your own way, pride, and preference.
54. If you want to reach this place of unrestrained passion, where all that matters in the whole world is Me‚ then choose the paths that I place before you. Let every decision you make be for Me. When met with the choice of doing the humble thing or the proud thing, choose the humble thing. When met with the option of sacrificing something for Me, give Me that offering as willingly as you can. When faced with a test or an intense battle, choose the weapons of My Spirit and fight for Me with all you've got. When hit with doubts or fears‚ reach out to Me with hands of praise and gratitude. When asked to carry a heavy load, come and let Me bear the burden with you.
55. All the choices you make for Me bring more and more of this passion into your life. All the times you choose to stand on My promises and put Me to the test bring you closer and closer to this place of all–compelling love for Me. If you want to reach this place where all you'll find is Me and the intense satisfaction that My completeness brings, then choose Me over anything else each time you are presented with a choice. Then you too will be able to say with Livingstone, "I have never made a sacrifice, for Jesus has always been enough."
56. (Jesus:) Don't be afraid of discovering that I am enough. Many people have this fear because they think that they will lose everything that they hold dear. But in reality, anything that you hold close to your heart except for Me, will at some point disappoint you. Only I will never change. Only I will endure and always meet your expectations. Only I can keep things together.
57. (Jesus: ) I know what it takes in each person's life to bring you to the place where you clearly see your own insufficiency, where you come to realize the vanity of the flesh and of the world, where your need for Me becomes a genuine fact, where desperation is an everyday word.
58. That is the place where you see things in the spirit, through My eyes, which are the eyes of the truest, deepest reality. That is the place where you see that I am the center, the reason, the meaning of everything‚ and that without Me there is nothing. It's a difficult position to be in, but it's the most beautiful, the most glorious‚ the most honored in the heavenly spiritual realm.
59. Whatever specific circumstances I use, whatever it is that I have asked you to forsake, or to endure, or to fight for, the end result of allowing you‚ My darling brides, to go through breakings, is to bring you to this very place in spirit. This is the place where you end and I begin. This is the place where you are nothing and I am everything. This is the place where I enter you and make love to you and possess you in a way that I never could when you were covered with the robes and props and distractions that I had to ask you to forsake.
60. It isn't My will and plan that you stay on the potter's wheel forever; that isn't the only way to retain this love, this knowledge, this connection, this understanding. It is My will, however, to allow things to come up in your life on a regular basis that will remind you of what you have gone through, what you have experienced, and what you have learned.
61. (Jesus:) To say that I am enough is also acknowledging that nothing is impossible to you. There is nothing that you cannot go through, nothing you cannot survive losing, nothing that can move you, because you would still have Me‚ and that's all you need. You are standing on the Rock, and there you cannot be moved.
62. When I take you, My vessel, from your place of usefulness and bring you into My "workshop" to refine you‚ remake you, and turn you into a better and more useful instrument‚ I like to leave a mark, a sign, a reminder, somewhere in your being, in your makeup, that will serve as a "sensitive spot" in your life.
63. I heal and restore, and I can make your mind and spirit and soul every whit whole, even after the most trying or devastating experience. Yet, if you are wise, you will allow and even pray for Me to leave something there as a reminder, as a token—a "trophy" would be a good way to look at it—of what you have gone through and how you have gained from it.
64. In a case where you have forsaken someone you loved dearly and leaned on, but then I made it clear that it was My time to move on‚ it's not My will that it'll always be painful for you to see them, to interact with them, to think about them‚ to do things you used to enjoy with them that remind you of them. Yet, it may well be My will that you feel a little twinge of missing them at times, or that you don't entirely lose all feelings for them.
65. You naturally think that a complete victory would mean you feel nothing for them and that you have no reaction at all to anything having to do with them. Yet in reality, that may not be the most desirable form of victory. A longer-lasting victory may be one of overcoming and rising above the intense pain and struggle, and yet in the end retaining a "soft spot" of feelings that come up from time to time as a reminder of what you have been through and a reminder of your own weakness.
66. Like the breaking itself‚ you can take it one of a few ways: You could harden yourself to it, ignore it, and push yourself to "get over it"—because that is possible; you could go the opposite route and let something that comes up take you "all the way back to the beginning" every time and relive the whole month or year of sorrow that you experienced at your low point; or you could let it cause you to praise Me and thank Me for how I helped you endure‚ rise above, and overcome—and at the same time let it serve as a reminder of how much you need Me, how much I mean to you‚ and how you learned during your depths of despair that I and My love really are enough and what matter most.
67. The prayer of your heart during a time of breaking shouldn't be "get me out of this as quickly as possible," or "once I get through this, I don't even want to remember it." The prayer of your heart should be that I will work however I see fit; that I will keep you soft, keep you connected, through whatever means I see fit. Sometimes that will mean that in the future you'll need to experience another "biggie" again to remind you of this. Often, though, the little "mark" I leave on your life, if you let it work the way I want it to—if you don't harden yourself to it or reject it—can accomplish that purpose.
68. (C.T. Studd:) There are very few who choose to follow the Lord so passionately, to love Him so unreservedly, to want Him so desperately that they are willing to give all. But it's then that, without regret or reservation, you will know that Jesus is enough.
69. (Jesus continues: ) The gift and weapon of loving Me intimately plays a key role in both gaining and retaining this gift of the knowledge that I am enough. When you are going through the mill of breakings, it makes all the difference to be able to rely on My love for you—to know for a fact that I love you deeply, intimately, passionately, unconditionally.
70. This isn't something you feel, imagine, or use as an escape from reality. It's something that becomes real to you when you find yourself with nothing else to lean on, no earthly supports, and when I come alive to you. When you love Me intimately‚ and frequently, and make this passionate love a part of your life‚ then this seals My place in your life.
71. While you may not experience the same level of desperation or passion in the form of feelings in the "good times" as in the "low times," there is a spiritual power found through loving Me intimately that will kindle and keep the fire of My love alive in a way that will keep you in a good position spiritually—a position of leaning on Me, of keeping Me in first place. A lot of this power is found in humility. When you go through an extreme breaking, when you find yourself stripped of everything you cared about, everything you wanted, that's where you gain humility.
72. Humility and loving Me intimately are inextricably linked. You can't become one with Me in spiritual intimacy without exposing yourself and your weakness and removing and forsaking your pride. And humility is the soil from which springs that crystal-clear pure understanding that I am enough and that I am everything.
73. So if you have come to that place, that knowledge, that beautiful‚ glorious position of finding that I am everything, and if you want to retain it, then continue loving Me intimately and bringing the blessings of humility, desperation, and a clear spiritual perspective into your life thereby.
74. Loving Me intimately clears away the rubble of the world, the rubble of the carnal mind, the rubble of physical, mental, or emotional props that tend to come between you and Me. You can do many other things without being totally humble and desperate, naked in spirit and knowing that you are nothing and I am everything. Yet you cannot love Me intimately—truly love Me‚ truly know Me, truly give yourself to Me—without reaching a place in spirit where humility reigns and where no coverings lie between us.
75. And it is in that place that I will remind you of how much you need Me. It is in that place where you will retain that hard-fought-for knowledge and understanding that I am enough‚ that I am the center of your life, your world‚ your universe, and that in comparison to Me, nothing else matters.
76. So come often to this place, My loves. Whether you are going through a high or low on the cycle of life, you can stay in a position of truly knowing Me, truly putting Me first, and truly seeing your need for Me, if you will strip your soul bare before Me and love Me as the bride that you are and that I need you to be.
77. (Mama:) I asked the Lord how it was that humility and loving Him intimately were so closely connected. The Lord has said many times that loving Him intimately takes humility, but there are some people who are very versed in saying love words to the Lord, but still struggle a lot with their pride, so I wanted to know how it worked in the spirit.
78. (Jesus:) You can say love words to Me without being humble, but you can't truly strip off your clothes in the spirit‚ place everything before My feet, and enter into heavenly intimacy with Me without leaving your pride at the door.
79. I've emphasized saying the love words because that's one step of humility. But for some people, once they get used to saying love words, it's no longer that humbling for them; they can almost do it without thinking about it.
80. What I'm talking about here is our merging of spirits, our communing heart to heart‚ our intimate loving, which is so intimate, so passionate‚ so complete, that even the concept of sex doesn't fully describe it.
81. In order to truly become one with Me‚ you must humble yourself. And when you are humble in spirit, lowly in your own eyes, laying everything before Me, I am irresistibly drawn to you, My loves. I am pulled by the vacuum you create, and our spirits become one in a powerful way. That is the ultimate in loving Me intimately.
82. (Jesus continues:) Your times are in My hands. Trust Me with your future. Don't worry about whether and when and how many breakings you'll need to experience to stay close to Me. Let Me worry about that. Your part is to let go, to trust Me, to surrender your life to Me—for that is part of what it means to be My bride. It means giving all to Me; it means letting Me fully possess you, literally take over your life, your spirit, your very being, and make it My property. When you do that, I will see to it that there will always be a reminder, in whatever form and whatever length and whatever degree I know is needed, of My importance in your life.
83. I won't let you go astray. I won't let you lose that love, that fire, that depth that you gained through your time in the furnace of trial. I will leave My mark on you‚ My seal of love, My seal of our connection, and of your dependency. Pray for it‚ desire it, and keep loving Me and giving yourself to Me over and over again.
84. Yielding, forsaking all, letting go—these aren't one-time things. There are especially poignant moments and significant times of decision when you do it in a more dramatic way‚ and the key to retaining the value of those milestone moments is to keep yielding, keep forsaking, and keep letting go. That doesn't always mean suffering and breaking. In fact, the more you yield and give to Me, the easier it becomes, and the less it hurts.
85. I do give you reprieve, times of surcease from battle, or at least easier battles. I am both a caring husband and a wise general. I send you out into the battle as My soldier, yet I also love you deeply and earnestly, and am entirely intent on you coming through the battle every whit whole, because I need you and desire you and care deeply for you. I want you in My bed of love. I want to have special and memorable happy and beautiful times with you.
86. It takes both sides to make our relationship well rounded. It takes the times of fighting side by side through the deepest, darkest‚ dirtiest battles, and it takes the times of refreshing and renewal in the beauty of life and love. A healthy spiritual life will be a balance of both. That is your destiny, your calling, what you should expect as My soldier bride.
87. (Dad:) There is great peace in yieldedness. There is great peace in allowing the Lord to do with you whatever He wills, in desiring whatever He desires for you. It means being willing to give up everything this world has to offer. It means allowing Him to lovingly and tenderly, one by one, remove from you anything that may come between the two of you, so that you can give yourself in complete abandonment to Him.
88. (Jesus:) The key to this single-mindedness, this self-sacrifice, this heavenly state of mind, is in My Word, dear ones. Paul gave a good account of how he felt in this regard, and some of what led him to it, when he said:
89. "What things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ. Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for Whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ, and be found in Him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith: that I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection‚ and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable unto His death. … Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus" (Phil.3:7–14).
90. To gain this closer walk with Me, where the things of this world have less allure and attraction, you must count the things of this world a loss if they keep you from Me. "How do I do that?" you ask. You do it by keeping your eyes on Heaven, on eternity, knowing that the things of this Earth are but a vapor that will pass away and be gone in a few short years‚ but the things of the spirit will endure forever. It's the eternal vision. The flesh and the things of this Earth that often seem so important now will soon be gone.
91. So forget the things that are behind, or will soon be behind, and reach forward to the things that are before, pressing toward the mark of your high calling. Focus your mind on heavenly places, thinking of that which is to come rather than on the things which are, the many things that surround you.
92. I know this is difficult. It was difficult for My servant Paul, too, and has been difficult for many of My servants down through the ages. Sometimes to "count all things as loss," you must suffer the loss of some or all of these things. This is where the forsaking process that is the life of a disciple comes in. Pride and other bad habits and attitudes must be forsaken. Friends and loved ones sometimes disappoint you or fail you. Mates and children sometimes forsake you. Positions or leadership come and go. All things change or pass away eventually, and only I endure.
93. In the end, you are able to say‚ as My dedicated servants often have, "You can have this whole world, but give me Jesus!" In the end, you find that loving Me and living for Me is enough, and that as you do so, all the other things you need are added unto you. In giving up everything, you receive everything.
94. (Jesus: ) While the spirit may be willing, the flesh is weak‚ and it often gets in the way. Each of you have crutches that bind you. You are assisted by the supports of the carnal. You have attachments that‚ if they were immediately taken from you, would leave you feeling wobbly. You have come to depend on different things‚ such as your carnal reasoning, your associating happiness with having or not having certain things, or the sense of security that you derive from things such as pride or self-preservation. These "supports" are what keep you from tasting and seeing that I am good, and that I am all that you really need. In bringing you through trials and heartaches, My goal is to take away these supports. I want to wean you from them and show you that you don't need them.
95. This is another reason why I want you to embrace the perilous times. This is one reason why I have asked you to welcome the battles. They are only cleansing you from everything that stands in the way of your seeing Me in the form that I truly am—of being your One and Only.
96. Sometimes My servants have so much love for Me that they willingly endure the loss of all these things, counting them but dung. Most of the time, however, they develop this love through their breakings and through the losses they undergo. Their love deepens and matures and grows through their heartbreaks and their tears, and develops from the ground of a broken and a contrite heart.
97. As it has been said about leadership, there are so few leaders because they can't seem to be broken fast enough, and I can only use broken men and women. So it is with those who would say, "Jesus is enough; He's all I need!" Often before they reach that point I must break them and remold them into a different and better vessel—one who has experience with loss and heartbreak and pain; one who has come to Me for comfort and compassion and relief, and has found that I am truly all that matters in the end, and that loving Me and doing My will are enough.
98. I am able to change the hearts of those who desire to draw nigh to Me, and who are willing to let Me draw them away from the things of this world. As they pass through the fires of these tests, the impurities are burned out little by little.
99. Don't dread these things, My dears and darlings. Give yourselves to Me with praise and thanksgiving, knowing that I do all things well and out of love for you. If you wish to become this way, to be able to say‚ "Jesus is enough," ask Me to do whatever it takes to instill that attitude in you. I can do it, and will do it, and will not suffer you to be tempted above what you are able to bear. Begin to look at each thing that happens in your life as a time to draw closer to Me, an opportunity to come to know Me better and prove My promises. As you do, I will make you a new creature. That's My Word and My promise to you.
100. (Jesus: ) Knowing Me as your all in all, knowing that I am enough and everything to you, is a spiritual treasure that is difficult to come by. So much stands between you and this gem of great price, this spiritual realization which is so precious. So many are hesitant to grasp it and claim it as their own. It takes deep desire and forsaking of yourself and your own wants and preferences in life. Only when you truly give Me 100 percent of yourself—everything—can I give you this precious treasure‚ and only then are you empty enough to contain it.
101. For most people it takes experience, and usually breaking and battles, to get to the point where you really reach out to Me for this jewel, where you seek and search diligently and openly, and are desirous and ready to possess it. It doesn't have to take experience, but few really want it until they are broken and emptier of their own ideas.
102. The good news, though, is that once you're at the point where you want it, it's easy to find. I'm more than happy to run to you, to take you into My arms, and enjoy this new level of intimacy and passion with you. In a way, that's what this is—a degree of intimacy and closeness to Me. And a secret to building the hunger and vacuum for Me that brings Me into your heart in this way is loving Me intimately in full freedom and abandon.
103. (Jesus:) You are primarily spiritual beings, My darlings. Right now your spirits are housed in physical bodies and carnal ways. By "carnal ways" I mean that you have a propensity to operate in ways that please your physical existence. For example, if you are hungry and somebody places a nice piece of pie in front of you, even if there are several others around you who are also hungry, the natural inborn tendency of the flesh—your carnal way—is to take that pie for yourself and to eat it. That's the inborn reaction of the flesh.
104. That's why I've said that "your ways are not My ways, for as the heavens are high above the earth, so are My ways above your ways" (Isa.55:8,9). I am trying to get you to see that there are other ways that are much more important than the carnal, or natural, human, typical reaction ways. There are the ways of the Spirit of God. And as you have often found out, the only things that satisfy your spirit are the ways of the Spirit of God.
105. Back to our example: If you grabbed that pie and ate it, your flesh would be satisfied, but your spirit would not be fed and nourished by that act. But if you let another person take it, that act would actually feed your spirit, give it a degree of satisfaction, and actually nourish it and help it to grow. Help it to grow how?—By making it more mature, happier‚ more satisfied, more able to sacrifice for others, etc. Your spirit would grow as a result of that act.
106. This is a simple illustration, but it illustrates the basic makeup of your being. You are of the earth and therefore earthly, and your bodies need to be taken care of, nourished, kept from harm, and to grow. But you are also of the spirit and spiritual, and your spirits also need to be taken care of, nourished, kept from harm, and to grow.
107. It is the great test of life, and it all comes down to learning the main lessons of life and of free choice; of seeing if man will choose to grow his spirit and mature spiritually and come to the realization that the eternal world where his spirit lives is what he should devote his time and life to nourishing, or whether he will choose to feed only his body and his flesh, which starves his soul.
108. Man was once more spiritually attuned, and had the right priorities. But I gave him choice. I gave the Devil control over the carnal world and allowed him to present man with that choice. Man chose, as you know, the lust of the flesh‚ the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, and therefore fell from the state of putting the spiritual first‚ to dwell in the carnal‚ and thus your spirits now dwell in a carnal realm. That's what being born in the "state of sin" means. Every human born after Adam and Eve was born into the carnal nature, to where their natural propensity is to satisfy their flesh rather than their spirit.
109. I came and died for you to open a way back into the spiritual nature, but each person has to choose to accept it. Once you choose it, once you've chosen Me, invited Me into your heart‚ and accepted My gift of salvation, then where you dwell in the spirit world depends on your further choices. In other words, I've opened the door back up to the spiritual state of happiness and complete fulfillment‚ but whether or not you choose to dwell there and how far in it you dwell depends upon your choices.
110. It's often hard to really believe that happiness dwells in the spiritual places. It's easier to believe that you can get it through carnal means, such as taking that piece of pie, or by any number of natural, physical things that you have an inborn human desire for.—Maybe by working for money so you can get any physical things you want, like a car, a house, a good-looking husband or wife‚ etc. However‚ you would find in the end that these things did not satisfy you. Why? Because satisfying your flesh or your carnal nature is not the way to satisfy your starving spirit.
111. So many people are like this. Thousands upon thousands and millions upon millions are searching for happiness, but in all the wrong places. This is what your lives on Earth are all about: finding this door back to true happiness, which is only in the spirit. And for you, My children of David, it's all about showing others where to find that door, that entrance—Me.
112. And once you've found the doorway, once you've opened it and what lies beyond it becomes available to you, the next choice is which direction you'll follow. You still have that choice! Are you going to go the way of satisfying your spirit, often at the cost of your carnal satisfaction? Or are you going to choose to satisfy your carnal desires, usually at the cost of your spiritual satisfaction?
113. Now here is the problem: The flesh and the carnal world are only for a time. They will pass, and your spirit will leave this body and will go to another place and be housed in a spiritual house, and what you have there will for the most part be framed and built upon what you gained while on Earth—by your choices on Earth to either grow your spirit or to feed your carnal ways.
114. It simply comes down to the fact that you are first and above all a spiritual being. And only when you learn that happiness, fulfillment, and satisfaction only come through satisfying your spiritual nature will you be truly happy. As long as you're giving anything carnal—any carnal desire, any carnal nature, any carnal proclivity or tendency—a higher priority than the needs of your spirit, you will not find true satisfaction.
115. Because you are naturally so earthbound and so steeped in the carnal nature that your forefathers chose, and which you were born into‚ that is your natural direction, the one you would normally choose. But when your spirit begins to grow and mature through experience‚ then you begin to learn that those choices don't really satisfy your spirit. They may satisfy your body temporarily, but the only thing that satisfies your spirit are choices made for Me.
116. That's why it all comes down to "Jesus is enough." I am enough because I am all the things that satisfy your spiritual needs. I am love, I am kindness, I am gentleness, I am longsuffering, I am mercy. I am the satisfaction of your spirit. It is Me. I am the tree that contains the fruits that satisfy you. And by "you," I mean what you primarily are and what you were primarily created as, and that is a spiritual being. It just so happens that you are housed in a physical body and a carnal nature‚ so your proclivity is to go the carnal way and make carnal choices.
117. But through life on Earth I try to lead each person back to Me. First through salvation, and then through feeding on My Word, and through experience, I try to lead everyone as deeply into My Spirit as they will choose to go. The further they go, the happier they are.
118. When will you get to the stage that "Jesus is enough"? Well, that depends on you. That depends on how much you learn from your experiences in the carnal and how much you implement the counsel in My Word. I won't be enough if you are making carnal choices. Choosing Me usually means forsaking and setting aside the things of the flesh. So if I don't satisfy you right now, at this moment, if I'm not everything to you, that's probably because you are choosing to satisfy your carnal nature and desires more than your spirit. Thus your spirit just isn't satisfied, because you are not making the choices that satisfy it.
119. It all depends on your choices and on the balance of choices you are making. Do you desire to satisfy the carnal? Then I won't be satisfying you. But if you are making choices for Me and toward Me, then carnal desires will become less important to you.
120. The more you choose to satisfy your spirit, the more satisfaction of spirit you receive from Me. It's a habit you form. If you feed the flesh, then you will crave more flesh; but if you major on feeding your spirit, then it's the spirit that you will desire. Ultimately, satisfaction of spirit is the only thing that will really fulfill and satisfy you. But satisfying the flesh can become addicting, and definitely get in the way of spiritual feeding and satisfaction.
121. That's why Paul said he counted all things but dung that he might win Me, because the choices he made in life were toward Me and the spirit, to the point where he didn't care about the flesh anymore. The same with Enoch. He wanted Me so much that I just took him (Gen.5:24). I saw he no longer cared at all—one iota—for the things of the carnal world, so I took him as he was, and he lives with Me today, whole and perfect in spirit.
122. "The spirits of just men made perfect" (Heb.12:23) is what you are all headed for if you make these choices to go for the spirit, and to nurture, grow, and satisfy your spirit rather than your flesh; if you change the balance of your life to majoring on satisfying your spiritual nature as opposed to your carnal nature. The choice is all yours. I'm doing everything I can, of course‚ to help you and nudge you and get you to go for the spiritual.
123. That's why I often allow sickness‚ afflictions, health problems‚ accidents, natural disasters‚ and a whole spectrum of the Devil's evil. I permit him to inflict these things. He is My messenger boy. I use him. And My intention is that it will bring you back to Me and toward spiritual satisfaction. If you are dwelling too much in the flesh, or if there is a next step I want you to take in your spiritual nature, I often allow things in the flesh to take a turn for the "worse," because it creates an opportunity for your spirit to take a step for the better. Get it?
124. That's what it's all about. It's all about coming to the realization that, "Yes, Jesus is enough," and then following through with making choices in that direction. I will satisfy your spirit, but the choice depends upon you, upon what choices you are making, and what direction you are going with your choices. The balance of how much you're feeding your carnal nature or how much you're feeding your spiritual nature determines the degree to which I am enough to you.
125. If I'm not quite enough to you, well‚ then you can pretty much figure it's because you're yielding to and looking for satisfaction in the flesh, at the cost of satisfying your spiritual desires. If you were yielding more to your spiritual nature and doing those things that would feed and satisfy your spirit, I would be closer to being enough. That's the answer.
126. Of course, I realize the predicament you're in. You are trapped between the carnal nature and the spiritual nature, so I don't blame you at all for your choices. They are hard. It's difficult to get out of the carnal nature. So I just keep giving you chances and I keep hoping and praying for you and doing all I can from My side to help you to make the right choices. So do your spirit helpers. But I and they can't by any means force you. It has to be a freewill choice on your side to make those decisions. The results wouldn't accrue to you if I forced you. So although I can present opportunities, you have to take the steps.
127. So look around you. What opportunities am I giving you now? Will you take them and use them to take the spiritual steps I want you to take toward My nature? That's what will satisfy you and last. I realize it's hard. But it's also important for you to understand that it will make a difference in your spiritual state and your spiritual satisfaction when you come to your spiritual house here with Me. Knowing this, I urge you to make wise choices. They will only build up for your good and spiritual wealth—both when you get to Heaven, and now, in your life on Earth.
128. "Only what's done for Christ will last." That is so, so true. The results and fruits of those choices to step closer to Me will last forever in My world, where you are all headed.
129. So, My dear loves‚ My darlings whom I gave everything for, I want you to be as happy as you can, and I pray for you, that you will be. I will be enough for you, if you want Me to. I love you eternally and can hardly wait for you to come to Me.
130. (Jesus:) Discovering that I am enough is an experience that each person must go through for themselves. Receiving the passion and desire to find this out comes from loving and cherishing My Word, from spending time with Me, and going through all of life's experiences together. Then, like someone who has fallen in love, you will want more of Me. You will want to know how I think, how I feel, how I would like for you to go about something. You then discover how wise, how resourceful, and how wonderful I am. I will become everything to you.
131. (Jesus:) When I am enough for you, you have come to realize that I am all you need in order to be happy and satisfied, and you've accepted that and desire to live it too. You don't need anything else to make you happy, to satisfy you, or to make life worth living—I am enough. Think about that; it's a very deep statement.
132. It's not something that comes naturally or easily, for there are numerous physical things that stand in the way of your really letting go and leaning completely on Me, of your really experiencing Me to the full, and discovering that I am enough, I am everything. With the battles, the testings, the lessons, and the experiences in your lives, I am removing those props and showing you that they're nothing, and you only need Me. I'm driving you to that place where your spirit can truly lean on nothing but Me, want nothing but Me‚ and taste the fullness of My satisfaction.
133. This is not an easy thing, to really know and live the fact that I am enough, but it's a choice you can make. How much you attain this degree of closeness and intimacy with Me is up to you and your decisions. You come close to it by feeding your spirit more than your flesh‚ by investing in and choosing the spiritual things‚ and training yourself to desire spiritual satisfaction over carnal satisfaction.
134. And it can be a rather lonely and even somewhat scary thing: leaving everything else behind, forsaking and abandoning it all and putting it all in My hands, telling Me to do with it what I will, and actively putting Me first in your life. But once you do, if you can make it past the initial loneliness or scariness of letting go of everything you love and hold dear, and putting it all firmly in My hands, you will then reach the point where you find all things restored to you one hundredfold.
135. You'll find that I give back most of the things that you've put in My hands‚ only keeping from you those things that would hurt you. And the things I give back to you are polished and perfected and even more beautiful and precious than before. You find that My blessings are such‚ and the deep spiritual satisfaction is such, that the sacrifices you made in forsaking initially cannot even be compared to the rewards.
136. And then the cycle continues as you must continue to give everything back to Me, entrust it to My care, and tell Me to keep from you anything that would draw you away from Me and My highest will and our love relationship—the ultimate pearl of great price.
137. It's a big forsaking, and if you're not there right now, if you feel you can't do that‚ don't be discouraged. Work toward it! Feed your spirit more and more to strengthen your faith. Choose Me and My ways more and more—just for this reason. Love Me intimately—that's a big key. Tell Me that you want Me to be more important than anything else in your life‚ you want Me to be everything for you, you want Me to be enough, and then draw close to Me in every way you can.
138. I'll be there for you, and I'll help you to walk up this road that leads to the extremely liberating, satisfying, and exhilarating experience that is knowing and living this truth.
Copyright © 2006 by The Family International
Art by Tamar